What made you want to embark on a structured reflection series?
I wanted to embark on a structured reflection series as a way to mark my thirty-third year of life. I wanted a project that could be year-long, so it needed to provide structure and flexibility. Having guided reflection questions allows structure. Having themes allows room for flexibility. I also wanted a project that could blend different mediums, in this case writing and digital art.
The Meandering Reflective is a year-long reflection series.
Meandering: I described the project as "meandering" to emphasize the natural and unpredictable flow of a year in one's life. Though we can try to make plans, time determines which plans come to fruition. Meandering allows a balance between intentional goal-setting and making space for whatever comes along.
Reflective: I divided the year into six themes to reflect upon. How the year unfolds will be discovered through experience.
One of the questions that naturally arose as I've healed from abuse was: "What do I do with the good?" - What do I do with the memories that bring a smile to my face, but include people who abused me? What do I do with the life lessons those people taught me? What do I do with favourite songs and bands that I was introduced to by those people?
I have come to understand I can keep the good I want to keep. Even if the process is complicated at first, or for a while. Even if the person was complicated (who isn't?). Even if the person allegedly hurt someone. Even if the person hurt me or another person. Even if...
I have been feeling very calm recently. Kevin and I purchased and moved into our first house. We've still got some boxes to unpack and organizing to do, but we feel very at home here. Very peaceful. We had a good team supporting us. And Kevin and I had one another to rely on at each stage of the house-buying process.
Each step in the process brought its own blend of pressures and emotions. I worried the fact that I'm a homemaker would hinder our mortgage pre-approval process. It didn't. And my good credit combined with Kevin's good credit to help our situation. When we were evaluating and comparing properties, both the practical setting and the feel of a place influenced our decisions. We didn't want to live somewhere difficult to access or live in. We wanted a structurally and intuitively solid home. A residence needs structural and emotional stability to have any chance to be a home.